eavesdropping

Let's take a sec...and get away from the gloom and doom. Sheesh...I just barely got started on my "Nut House" memoirs and have a long way to go. I just have to get them down on something other than toilet paper.



Ive been at Panera Bread all morning. It's a million voices all at once....and those annoying vibrating things that signal your food is ready.......I jump everytime those things go off. Luckily, the head phones are on and I need a boost.....Beethoven's Ninth....."Choir Version of Ode to Joy." Can you believe this guy composed this song by cutting the legs off a piano so he could feel the vibrations? That is genius.....and it's no one has ever come close. Mozart was a punk.



Anyway, to my left is a group of older gentlemen that seem to come here often. From what I have overheard they are discussing the end of the world. I don't see a Mayan Calendar, but they are discussing something they saw on the Bible channel. Is it me, or should the Bible channel (or whatever it is called) have like more uplifting stuff in it's programming. They are intense about it. Another thing....if I was getting coffee on my AARP card, which I will.....well scratch that......I would be discussing anything but the end of the world. Hell, it's coming for them anyway. Don't rush it pal.



Two other elderly gentlemen just about put me to sleep. Let me give you the conversation and try to stay awake. "Uh, gas went up again Earl...yep, 14 cents overnight." "Yeah, Im getting my oil changed next week, think Im gonna try that synthetic oil this time." "Hey, it's 11, the coffee just got changed out, it's fresh. I'm gonna get a cup." Please, put a pillow over my head and push till I don't fight anymore if i know when the coffee is gonna be fresh at Panera...please.

It's funny, but if my Grandfather was alive, this would be Mecca for him, so I shouldn't make too much fun.



If you are a moron, please stay away from me. I cannot help you. some idiot came up to me and asked me if I could help him jump his car off. No problem. I grab my cables and ask him where his car is. Im at Panera in Cleveland.....Paul Huff Parkway.....across from the Mall....or as I call it the gigantic waste of space that should be a golf course...a school....anything but a crappy Kmart. Can you imagine a Mall that doesn't have an arcade...wait, neither does Hamilton Place. Where can a guy get some Galaga in........Id would love to play some Mortal Combat.



Two girls are sitting across from me talking about guys. Guess what, they are bitching. From what I understand, Girl #1 is upset because her man hates Grey's Anatomy and wants to watch football all weekend. Do I need to comment on that? She's not my type anyway. Girl #2 is upset because her sweetie brought her flowers, chocolates, and a DVD for her anniversary. Excuse me, but it's a down economy...I see no ring of any kind. She should be thankful. Of course, I would have taken my girlfriend of two weeks to Hawaii first class. Question though, what did she get him? I know what he wanted....bet he didn't get it.



Ok...you cannot eat a breadbowl with a plastic fork......I think Ill just start carrying silverware around. damn it.....I can't hear a thing right now and a buzzer went off at the next table. They should swap out pacemakers for these things.



Uh oh....just spotted a dude use his water cup and put coke in it.....should I rat him out. Nah, he deserves it. He's gotta try and get thru that breadbowl.....



Have a good day to all. If you read these, I appreciate it and any feedback...good or bad is welcome....just make it good.



Clayyyy