This one could run a little long........
First things first. This has been an amazing Holiday Season. Santa hooked this brother up with everything he wanted. Let's see:
- No screwups, no trips to jail, no drunken blackouts, everyone is healthy, Atlanta traffic was decent, and my Nana was feeling better.
- Good Report from my back surgeon
- Spent two days with my sister and brother in law in which we did nothing but reinvent the words, Sloth and Gluttony
-Got a sweet scarf and my 34th pullover (a sweet North Carolina one that was lined). Also, I was given more two books that I can't wait to dig into.
-Have gotten to spend some really good time with Emma. I mean...just Daddy. It's the best.
- Found out I have lost 14 pounds due to eating soymeat so, again, who knew???
Now, there were some newsworthy events over the last few days of 2008...let's start with one of my oldest and dearest friends....Leslie Marie Leach Davis. Lester and I have not seen or spoken to one another since my mother's funeral in 2002. Yes, Leslie andI dated, went together, or whatever it was termed in 1988, for a nanosecond in the 8th grade. After, what Im sure was a brutal break up, we ended up being good friends all the way through HS. She was always there with something positive to say, and gave good counsel. I digress.....
Thanks to the miracle that is Facebook, or FB as I heard it the other night, Bonnie, Emmamonster, and I met Leslie and her cutie of a daughter, Cameron for lunch last Tuesday afternoon....Jenkins Deli, no less.
Now, I gotta be straight and admit that I was a little nervous. There were several factors in play....First, this would mark the first time Bonnie would meet an old flame (ex-wife excluded), and for some dumbass reason I was thinking lightsabres would come out, or there might be hair pulling...alas....Im an idiot. What did happen was remarkable. Emma and Cameron stared each other down for 4 minutes..and now I think Cameron will be a bridesmaid someday. Bonnie jumped into the my conversation with Leslie....and now Leslie will be a bridesmaid for Bonnie someday. I swear I was looking around like a boxer that just took too many to the noggin. Secondly, after lunch, the all new Brady Bunch was on the way to see a movie and children become a cross between a crack head and/or someone that just drank three Red Bull's and straight sugar. Ok, so Im buying extra butter and some popcorn, Bonnie informs me that we are going to Leslie and her husband Joe's house for New Years. Also, Emmamonster and Cameron have asked me if Emma can go play at Leslie and Joe's house......I want to point out here...that Leslie has never met my daughter or my lovely bride to be, and hasn't seen me in 6 years. Things are going fast and furiously. Ok...so now the tough part.......
I have no doubt that I will probably have to admonish, and be a bad guy in front of everyone because Emma acts like she's in the midst of a sugar rush when it comes to movie. So , Iknow Im going ot have to be a bad guy in front of everyone 12-15 times because, that is normally the way it goes with her when the lights go down. I'm hoping that Cameron will be more stable....she's Leslie's kid, so I think I'm safe. Ok....the lights have gone down and a preview is playing.......Get this, I can't even tell you if the kids are behaving because I'm in a three-way conversation that could be heard in an Airplane hangar. I'm breaking my own code!!!! Shut the hell up when the lights come down!!! What am I thinking???? Then a great moment in Clay history arrives with the force of blunt trauma to the face!!!
A woman is walking down our row. I catch a glimpse of her and am about to get up to let her by.......but she stops.....right next to Leslie. She leans down and says to Leslie in a nice, even, calm voice....."Are you going to talk this loud through the whole movie, because if you are, I'm going to have to move." Just seconds before Leslie's face was to turn to the shade of a deep Crimson mixed with......Scarlet, a guttoral laugh started to swell in my belly, for I know that I am about to crap my pants laughing.
I have known this girl for 21 years and as far as I know, she has NEVER,EVER,EVER gotten in trouble with anyone. Teachers had lottery's to have her grace there classes,and just got called out by a grandmother for talking in a movie. Folks, the funniness of our children being angels while we were acting like fools was truly priceless. The thing was....we all put our heads down like we'd been caught in the cookie jar and were embarassed half to death. Maybe, you just had to be there because I rarely laugh out loud (some sort of birth defect) but I giggled and almost choked up my entire chicken salad sandwich. Leslie handled it well though. She just looked at this lady like she was crazy and didn't say a word. It was good that the mild mannered teacher was sitting there. Bonnie and I probably would have said something stupid.
This is going to have to be two.....I haven't even gotten to picking Emma up from Cameron's 3 hours later. I had no idea that I was about to go into a time warp with old stories, high school annuals, lasagna, and blowing out my elbow playing tennis on Wii.
I will just close with the fact that it was the start of a great day.....and the beginning of something bigger.
Part two will probably be tomorrow....Bama plays the Utes in an little while and Ill be full of dip and beer by the time it's over.
Good night.
-
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